20 TV shows and characters that changed the way I, and probably we, view America

Last week I was thinking about Will and Grace and how these fictional characters changed the course of this nation's history when, more than five years after it went off the air, it inspired Joe Biden to make the "blunder" of suggesting that this show changed attitudes toward gay people and prompting President Barack Obama's public support of marriage equality.  At first, my opinion tended toward that of Stephen Colbert and Eric McCormack in feeling that this was kind of a silly reference for our vice president to make then, I saw Modern Family for the first time last week. 

Watching this mixed up group of people attempt to love each other, the gay men raising a daughter, the strange marriage between Gloria and Jay, and the classically obnoxious teenagers who remind me of childhood friends; I couldn't help but feel a little more acceptance for step families, gay men raising children, and, yes, even those annoying teens. 
Think about it, when we treat people for OCD, we use systematic desensitization to show the afflicted person how unreasonable their convictions are.  Why shouldn’t we praise our main source of entertainment, prime time TV, when they use the same concept to show afflicted bigots, and sorrowfully ignorant people how unreasonable their convictions are? 
This thinking prompted me to think back on the TV I've watched over my lifetime, and fight the urge to call my mother and declare that I've finally found value in all that time I spent in front of the television set.  Let me share with you the result of my epiphany: my list of 20 TV shows and characters that changed the way I, and probably we, view America. 
When you finish reading this list, think about the characters and story lines that changed you, inspired you, or reflected on your life.  By the time I finished this list of progressive television moments, I was convinced of one thing, and I think you will be too... Joe Biden isn't foolish; he's spot on as usual.
 

#20 - LA Law/Dawson's Creek/ Star Trek -   I tied these three shows for making a similar ground breaking choice; they showed acceptance of  love that wasn’t socially acceptable at the time. On LA Law episode #95, "He's A Crowd", Abby Perkins  and "C.J." Lamb briefly but passionately kissed each other outside of a restaurant after finishing a difficult case. This was the first kiss between two women on a prime time TV series. On May 24, 2000 two male characters, Jack and David, also kiss and it is the first between two men in a prime time TV series. I would venture to say that it’s possible that without this ground breaking moment, neither of the above kisses would have happened: In 1967 Shatner and Nichelle Nichols who played, Captain Kirk and Lieutenant Uhura in the Original Series kissed.  This was the first interracial kiss in television history. 
#19 - Sesame Street - This show premiered November 10, 1969 to positive reviews, some controversy, and high ratings and by the show's tenth anniversary in 1979, 9 million American children under the age of six were watching Sesame Street daily.  It received some flak for being a highly integrated show, for being "too wholesome" and for warping the educational processes of children with liberal ideas.  Today, the show still makes strides toward promoting acceptance, understanding and community, with notable guests like Neil Patrick Harris and his character, "The Shoe Fairy" subtly prodding us toward the acceptance of all minorities from those of different races, genders and sexual orientations. 

Even though this is not a show that falls in line with most of the others on the list, I include Sesame Street because of the enormous impact it made on me when I was little, when I grew up with a painting of Sesame Street at the foot of my bed till I was 19 years old, and when I watched my sons sing, dance, identify letters, and cheer for Big Bird’s teddy, Radar.  Radar was named after Walter "Radar" O'Reilly of M*A*S*H, who had a teddy bear and was also lovably naive and innocent. Radar was given to Big Bird by Gary Burghoff when he guest-starred on the show.   I cannot emphasize enough to you, how very awesome I find this piece of trivia, linking my favorite childhood show, and MASH.

#18 -X-Files - Dana Scully almost slipped by me till my friend, Starla Roddan, pointed out her value.  “Dana still inspires me as an educated, dedicated, driven atheist and medical investigator still willing to pursue avenues that aren't in line with her beliefs and knowledge, yet always relying on evidence."  Dana Scully has become a symbol of feminine strength, intelligence and leadership

#17 - I Love Lucy - This show and its fabulous work with humor is also notable because it was the first show that had a Hispanic man, Desi Arnez, as a main character.  When Lucy and Ricky welcomed their son, (real life Desi Arnez Jr.) to the show it was a mere 12 hours after Lucy had undergone a C-section to give birth to him.  His was the first birth ever presented on television and that’s really quite exceptional, considering that it occurred at a time when you couldn't say the word pregnant on TV or even show a married couple sleeping in the same bed.

#16 - Golden Girls - There's just something liberating to be a woman and watch Sofia's dry humor, Rose's dumb nativity, Blanche's sexuality, and Dorothy's pragmatism that round out to an empowering show about both feminism and aging with dignity.  Episodes where Blanche’s brother is gay, where we learned that AIDS is not a bad person’s disease, and when Dorothy’s son marries a black woman, shatter the social conventions and desire to cling to bigotry that persisted in the late 80's and early 90's with a most powerful weapon - humor.

 

#15 -Maude - In 1972 (two years prior to Roe v. Wade) Bea Arthur (of later Golden Girls fame) challenged cultural norms with her character, a forty five year old woman named Maude, who was the first woman to have an abortion on prime time television. Abortion was considered so taboo at the time that two CBS affiliates refused to carry the episode and 32 others were successfully pressured not to rerun the show. In all, CBS received 24,000 letters of complaint. Even today, TV shows continue to deal with abortion in a very delicate manner.

#14 - That 70's Show - Uh... The pot circle.  Need I say more?

# 13 - Will and Grace - Even if you ignore the heartwarming humor and humanity of the ensemble relationships in this situational comedy, you have got to acknowledge that it is very awesome that these characters inspired Joe Biden to make the "blunder" of suggesting that this show changed attitudes toward gay people and prompting President Barack Obama's public support of marriage equality.

#12 - Home Improvement - Amid the grunting, tool talk, and three teenaged boys, we watch Jill Taylor juggle house and home while pursuing her college education and demonstrating a particular brand of 90's feminism that I identified with.   I watched each Tuesday evening, while I waited for my own mother to return from college night classes.

#11 - West Wing - During the ultra-conservative Bush Era, this show offered a place of sanity, respite, and hope to left-wingers everywhere.  I somehow managed to miss this series.  However, every time I broach the subject of television with a fellow progressive, this or MASH is always listed as a defining influence.  As such, I can’t help but give it a place on my list.

 

#10 - Sex in the City - I didn't have HBO when this show came out, and even if I had, my mother wouldn't have let me watch it.  That didn't stop Carrie and her friends from impacting my life.  I listened as criticism rolled in stating that the show glamorized sex inappropriately, and wondered at how terribly naughty it must be for years before I finally saw it.  After watching every episode, and all the movies, I've come to recognize this show as anything but raunchy or naughty.  Instead, it humanized the fact that women have can have sexual libido, drive for power, success and love, and integrity too.  This show taught me that I deserve happiness, and told me to go out and find it with the same devotion to self that a man would.  I appreciate this lesson every day as I approach my thirties, and do so with confidence.

#9 - Murphy Brown - When I was a little girl, my daddy used to set me up on his knee and tell me that I could grow up and be anybody I wanted to be, then he'd send me off to bed and tell me to sleep.  In bare feet, and a pink nightgown I would crawl like a GI Joe on my belly down the hall, through the dining room and kitchen so I could peek around the corner to the living room.  From there I would watch Murphy Brown demand respect and cuss Dan Quayle for chastising her ability to be a single working mom.  There, on my mother's kitchen floor, I watched Candace Bergan and her puffy shoulder pads elbow their way into a man's world.  In those moments, on white linoleum, the glass ceiling in my mind was shattered.  Thanks to Murphy Brown, I believed the message my dad instilled in me while I sat on his knee.  For that, Murphy gets a top ten spot at number nine.

#8  - The Cosby Show - When I was little, I lived in a predominantly white neighborhood, with white peers at school, white role models on TV and a white baby doll that I named after myself.  The only time I was exposed to black people was when they were portrayed as gangsters, bad guys, and thugs on the news, or when they were portrayed as educated, smart and loving on the Cosby Show.  Thanks to Bill Cosby and his TV family, I was presented with an alternative view to prejudice and racism.  I grew up thinking that little black girls were just like me- full of love, life and a little orneriness.  When I think of the most reasonable parents on television when I was growing up, I would certainly have named the Huxtables first.  In fact, it wasn't till nearly a decade after I saw my first episode of the Cosby Show that I even considered race as a reason that someone might feel prejudice, and I am thankful to the Huxtables for teaching me just how absurd that idea is. 
Now that I am a mom, and I watch mostly white characters try to tell my boys what to buy, how to act, and who to respect, I recognize the value of good role models.  I also wonder to myself, what Claire Huxtable would think if she turned on the Disney Channel today and saw Michelle Obama gardening and discussing healthy food choices with children.  I imagine her smile would be wide and proud.

#7 - ER- Though it is clear that the majority of this show focuses around the medical drama, and the coming of age issues of John Carter, for me the most influential story line revolved around Kerry Weaver.  From the beginning of the series, Kerry impressed me with her ability to persevere after being born with congenital hip dysplasia.  Her battle with understanding and coping with the fact that she was adopted, and dealing with a difficult relationship with her birth mother moved me.  However, in the final seasons of ER, Kerry revealed her inner struggle with the fact that she is a lesbian.  Her love story, with firefighter Sandy Lopez, their journey to parenthood, and the legal battle that ensues over the custody of their son, Henry, when Sandy dies literally shook me, and all ER viewers, to our core.
While Kerry’s journey dominates my memories of ER, I also remember other story lines addressing AIDS, homosexuality, cancer, mental illness, healthcare, poverty, race, class, bureaucracy, and more.  Every character, while flawed, showed heroism and humanity at one point or another.  This reflection of America was profound, spot on, and moving.  As one of  my personal favorites, I place it in the # 7 slot.

#6 - The Mary Tyler Moore Show - That iconic image in the opening credits, of Mary throwing her hat, is burned into my mind as a metaphor for the independence and strength of woman represented in this show.  May earns the number six spot for showing America that a woman can live and work independently and successfully.  Before I ever saw any The Golden Girls, or Murphy Brown,  or Ellen, or Roseanne… I saw Mary Tyler Moore.  I remember a particular episode where Ted and Mary take a writing class.  Ted, fraught with writers block, steals Mary’s work and presents it as his own, and Mary nearly implodes as she watches him read it aloud to the class.  This moment stuck in my head, as a symbol of all the times my mother, a young woman in the 70’s, took second place to a boy that did lesser work than she.  When I learned last month, that all the boys on the ski team in my mom’s high school received college scholarships, and none of the girls did, even though the girls’ team advanced farther that year, I thought of Mary and that look of frustration as Ted was praised for her efforts.

 

#5 - Ellen- This series comes in at number five for the fact that she came out on her show.  Before it aired, there was so much social commentary on the issue and that the episode's air date is listed as a significant day in history, April 30th, 1997, on the History Channel website.  I was fourteen when Ellen announced she was gay, and so was her character.  I remember arguing with people close to me, about whether we should watch her show, about whether we supported her or not.  For the first time in my life, a television show created a social dialogue in which I participated. 

I was proud to stand by Ellen in 1997, just as I was proud to stand by her in 2012 when JC Penney was condemned for casting her in their television commercials. In both cases she put herself on the line, she faced an angry and bigoted public, and she opened doors for others like herself.  I admire her tenacity, nearly a decade and half after she came out, she still fights for her right to simply be herself.  Even today she is constantly accused of having little or no values, and yet her values as she describes them in 2012, seem to be just as noble now as they were in 1997. Last spring, after JC Penney announced its advertising campaign, and Ellen suffered the backlash from it from so called "family values" groups,  Ellen stood up for herself, when she said," I want to be clear and here are the values that I stand for. I stand for honesty, equality, kindness, compassion, treating people the way you want to be treated, and helping those in need. To me those are traditional values. That's what I stand for."   All I can say is, “Me too Ellen, Me Too.”

#4 - The Simpsons - I ranked The Simpsons in the top five for several reasons.  First, and foremost, because it can be arguably classified as TV's most successful show, having been on the air since 1989 and holding the world record for most guest stars (600+) including Steven Hawking and Paul McCartney.  With progressive guest stars, thoughtful social commentary, and satire that rivals their newscasts, The Simpsons is quite possibly the best thing that FOX ever did. 

Lisa Simpson is the progressive heart of the show, though only eight years old, she is a vegetarian, feminist, environmentalist, supports gay rights and the Free Tibet Movement, and converted to Buddhism after studying the Noble 8 fold Path. Although all the characters either directly espouse liberal ideology or use comedy to poke fun at conservatives, Lisa's straightforward determination to use logic, morals and empathy prove her to be the voice of wisdom if not the spirit of Springfield.  Matt Groening, and his fine commentary on American culture and society which have forever changed our collective understanding of Americana in a way that cannot be denied.

#3 - All in the Family - The first rerun of All in the Family, I happened to catch was a Christmas themed episode where a draft dodger, David, and the father of a man who died in Vietnam, Steve, join the Bunkers for Christmas dinner. Within seconds of being exposed to Edith, Archie, Mike and Gloria, I was captivated.  

Having never before heard of or seen Archie Bunker, I was appalled when he reacted to learning of David dodging the draft by saying, "He owes an explanation to the Army, Navy, Marine Core, Commander-in-Chief of the U.S. of A.--the President!"  As that scene played out, and Archie deferred to Pinko's opinion by saying, "Certainly, your opinion is important--a Gold Star father! Your opinion is more important than anybody else in this room and I want to hear that opinion. I want the young people here to hear that opinion. You tell 'em, Pinky, you tell 'em!" Then, Pinko opened his mouth and I was amazed and what I heard that Gold Star father say, "I understand how you feel, Arch. My kid hated the war, too. But he did what he thought he had to do and David here, he did what he thought he had to do. But David's alive to share Christmas dinner with us. And if Steve were here, he'd want to sit down with him. And that's what I want to do."

In a little under thirty minutes, I experienced an amazing roller coaster ride of emotion that I soon found to be a delightful pattern of the series.  I felt empathy, anger, and I laughed all the while, as I looked over my shoulder to ensure that no one saw me watching a man spew hateful words like fag, fairy, negro, Pollack, or worse.  Edith's 50th Birthday and Gloria the Victim were among the many episodes that taught me about women's rights, the strength of women, and how very different things were for my mother, aunts, grandmothers and cousins who lived in a time when society blamed women for their own rape. 

 I also enjoyed episodes that challenged Archie's bigotry, such as Archie the Hero, in which Archie inadvertently gives a transvestite CPR.  In 1971, All in the Family became the first show to have an openly gay character. Archie's role as America's favorite bigot, and the constant rebuttal he receives from his son-in-law and daughter, has made a fine mirror for Americans to stare into, and laugh, while considering their reflection.

#2 - Roseanne  - Before this show came on the air, sitcoms and other forms of prime-time TV never really showed anything that resembled the actual American families I knew growing up.  Prior to Roseanne, issues of class, money, and real parents struggling to provide for real kids seemed to be like toilets, everybody knew they were around, but nobody put them on TV.

My mother hated Roseanne.  She thought that the woman, and the show, were brash, uncouth and foul.  Still, I remember watching Becky spin herself up in the telephone cord trying to get some privacy in that family kitchen, and knowing immediately that I, or any one of my friends, could easily be a Conner. Throughout the series, Roseanne provided a strong voice for women, confronted issues of race, and had some of the first gay characters I ever saw on TV.  I remember when Becky got birth control, when Roseanne and Dan struggled with whether or not to keep a pregnancy that might produce a sick child, when Jackie was beaten by a lover, when Roseanne's mom came out, when Darlene proposed to David and when Roseanne led a group of women out of Wellman's plastics after her boss sexually harassed her.  These were moments that I watched as an adolescent girl, and used as a reference point later in life, when I asked myself, "What would a strong woman do right now?"

Perhaps the most moving moments of the series were in the final episode when Roseanne gives a monologue from the little desk that her family built for her to write from in the basement of the Connor home. "Dan and I always felt that it was our responsibility as parents to improve the lives of our children by 50% over our own. And we did. We didn't hit our children as we were hit, we didn't demand their unquestioning silence, and we didn't teach our daughters to sacrifice more than our sons. As a modern wife I walked a tightrope between tradition and progress and usually I failed by outsiders standards or another's. But I figured out that neither winning nor losing count for women like they do for men. We women are the ones who transform everything we touch, and nothing on earth is higher than that."

Maybe Roseanne was brash, uncouth and foul.  I never saw her that way though.  I saw her as being a strong woman who fought for her family through tough economic times, against overpowering men and crushing social norms. In the final quote of the show as she describes her journey; I found her to be heartwarming and inspiring, “I learned that dreams don't work without action; I learned that no one could stop me but me. I learned that love is stronger than hate. And most important, I learned that god does exist. He and or she is right inside you. Underneath the pain, the sorrow, and the shame."

 

#1 - MASH  - This series simply must sit in the number one slot.  To this day, nearly thirty years after the show went off the air, it still holds its place as the most popular TV show of all time.  As of November 2011, the series finale, "Goodbye Farewell, Amen," is still the most watched television broadcast in US History. It was watched by approximately 125 million viewers. The finale aired from 8pm - 11pm on February 28, 1983. At 11:03 pm, EST, New York City public works noted the highest water usage at one given time in the City's history. This was due to the fact that in the three minutes after the finale ended, approximately 77% of New York City flushed their toilets.

MASH used the Korean War as a platform to discuss the social issues of the late 1970's and early 1980's including the Vietnam War, the draft, women's rights, racism, sexuality, religion and even gay rights.  Episodes such as "The Ringbanger" in which Hawkeye, Trapper and Radar work together to get a Colonel with reckless casualty rates home, and "For the Good of the Outfit" in which Hawkeye and Trapper attempt to force the army into taking responsibility for the accidental bombing of a local village, both show the injustice and lack of ethics in war.  "Dear Dad Three" tells the story of how Hawk and Trapper color the skin of a racist patient with iodine to teach him a lesson after he makes racist remarks and demands the "right color of blood."  A particular favorite of mine is titled simply, "George" and has a storyline that revolves around a gay soldier.  Burns tries to slap a dishonorable discharge on the kid, shouting “He's not normal!"  To which Hawkeye asks, "What's normal Frank?" Good old conservative Frank says, "Normal is everybody doing the same thing."  Trapper cannot let this answer stand, "What about individuality?" In classic MASH tongue in cheek enthusiasm an irate Frank declares, “Well, individuality is fine - as long as we all do it together."

The constant commentary on war and civil rights, and specifically the ability of this show to force people to use their two most valuable skills, humor and empathy, to look at their society make it an American classic to be proud of.

I'm certain that I’ve left some shows that are incredibly important out, but this list is based on my own meandering experience, and I can’t help that.  I think that perhaps Hawkeye said it best when he said, ""I can't say that I've loved you all…But I've loved as many of you as I could!"  That's how I feel about this subject.  I can't say that I've seen, let alone loved, all the progressive television there is, but I’ve shared with you as much of it as I could! 

Don't get me wrong, I'm a mom who limits the TV time and specific shows my kids watch.  I'm a person who sees quite a bit of mess, embarrassment, and melancholy in television.    I'm somebody who fully understands how shallow it sounds to assume that a television show alone can or should change a person's life. 

 

On the other hand, I’m also the mom who recognizes the value of a son who idolizes superheroes, Jedi and little cartoon people named Phineas and Ferb.  I am a person who looks for hope, inspiration, and good messages in crappy TV.   I am happy to see positive changes in our social expectations inspired by and reflected in our entertainment.  I don't fault Joe Biden a bit for referring our collective conscious back to the lovable characters of Will and Grace.  In a nation that probably has its fair share of citizens who know Will and Grace's names and life stories better than our vice president, Joe Biden's, it seems like a smart move to refer to such well known and well-loved characters to make his point.  

I hope you enjoyed this list of my favorite TV shows.  Please feel free to follow these links to my blog, Facebook page, and addictinginfo archives.